Once, there was a mom and her son. One bright day, they had a disagreement. And the disagreement turned out to be like manna from heaven.
This family lived a busy life. They had not unpacked from an out-of-town trip. They were late to an extended family gathering. And the mom was finishing paperwork that had to be postmarked that day.
In the midst of this bustle, the boy asked the mom about his afternoon baseball game. He asked respectfully, but he had asked before. He chose that moment to ask again, because he was running out of time.
Answering the boy’s question required the mom to listen, to talk to the boy’s father, to make a decision, and to work out details that she didn’t believe she had time to handle. And she certainly lacked patience at that moment. So, the mother’s anger flared, and she snapped unkindly at the boy.
The boy turned and trudged away. His shoulders were slumped, and he hung his head. His baseball game was important to him. And he couldn’t go without the mother’s help.
The truth is that the mom simply wanted her son to shut up, drop his request, and go away. She wanted to handle her urgent details, and she didn’t want to deal with the boy. She was being a selfish, lazy parent. I can say this, because the mother was me.
Thankfully, this story has a happy ending, because the Holy Spirit poured realization over my head like a cold shower. He caused me to step into my son’s shoes for a moment. He held up a mirror, and I saw ugliness. I decided to stop everything and make it right. It took swallowing my pride.
After a short discussion and a quick decision, my husband and I arranged for another parent to take our son to his baseball game that afternoon. Then, I asked my son’s forgiveness, making no excuses, and he readily gave it. Children tend to be generous that way.
You might be wondering how this disagreement was like manna from heaven. Well, this mother had a blog deadline that day, but she couldn’t think of much to write. And just like manna, delivered one day at a time and just ON time, the disagreement happened, followed by the lesson from the Holy Spirit. And the mother decided that maybe other mothers could benefit from her story. And so, she told it.
And guess what? Just before bed, as the mother was typing her last-minute blog, the son came to his mother, planted a kiss on her cheek, and said, “I just really love you.”
Now, who would have thought that swallowing one’s pride could turn out so well?
“But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.”
James 3:17
Note: The family got to attend the gathering together all morning, and the son’s team won their baseball game.
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Stephanie,
This is an inspiration and a lesson to me as a Father of two young boys. I do have to remember that i shouldnt be to busy to listen to the important things in my kids lives. I have to admit I am still learning on how to teach them to be respectful to mommy and daddy when we are talking and me being attentive to what they are trying to tell me. So Thanks for sharing.
I can remember a time when i stayed the night at your house as a younger boy and you giving up of your time with Barry and allowing him to take me to a basketball game i had to go to. Thanks for being apart of what was important to me at that time. Have a good day!
Adam, sweet Adam. Thank you.
You know, you mention respect, and Timothy is 13. When this happened, I thought of how I demand respect from him, but rarely remember (or think it is important) to give HIM respect in return. At 13, that is so important. To respect him, too. To stop, and try to remember what it was like to be that age, and to try to understand what is important to him. And to give him the same courtesy I expect to get from him.
I don't remember the basketball game, but I do remember the joy you brought to our house. I'm thankful for you.
Stephanie, This touched me. My heart melted a little when that boy kissed his mom and expressed his love/ Isn't that love just the best?
Thank you for your reminder to not rush through life with them, to listen to what is important to them. When we have infants we are so keyed in to their every signal – hungry, sleepy, wet. We know what each sound means. Then as they get older, we start to tune them out and attempt to turn them off at will. We are missing so much! Thank you for the reminder to key into the signals of our children regardless of their age….to know what each word really means – this is important to me, I want you to be a part of my life.
Feeling blessed!!
Well, Alicia, at 13, I thought that "I love you" from Timothy was pretty special, believe me. Kids that age don't just hand that stuff out. I took it as the gift it was, and also recognized the gift it was from the Holy Spirit, who taught me a hard lesson I needed to learn.
I'm so thankful for both you and Adam, and your sweet family. I know you guys know what treasure you have in that.
♥
A tale all of us, if completely honest, could tell. Stephanie, none of us are ever too old to learn and today you taught well.
Susan, you're so encouraging, and so good to read and comment. Thank you. You guys are the best.